8 th Grade Expository Unit On-Demand Writing. Texts: Today s Immigrants and Mexico Life at the Border REMINDER

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1 8 th Grade Expository Unit Summative On-Demand Writing 8 th Grade Expository Unit On-Demand Writing Texts: Today s Immigrants and Mexico Life at the Border REMINDER o o o o o Write your response to the writing prompt below. You many give your writing a title if you like, but it is not necessary. You may NOT use a dictionary. If you do not know how to spell a word, sound the word out and do the best you can. You may either print or write in cursive. Write clearly! Any erasures or strike-throughs should be as clean as possible. Writing Task: Write an essay in which you explain the concerns that exist today in the United States over illegal and/or legal immigration. Your essay should include an explanation of the situation and any problems and solutions that come to mind. To develop your essay, be sure to use specific evidence drawn from articles you have read including the articles mentioned above and/or any prior knowledge you have acquired on the issue. CHECKLIST FOR YOUR WRITING The following checklist will help you do your best work. Make sure you: carefully read the texts and the description of the writing task. develop a clear thesis (claim) related to the writing task. organize your writing with a strong introduction, body and conclusion. use specific details and examples to fully support your ideas. vary your sentences to make your writing interesting to read. check for mistakes in grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and sentence formation. Note: This format is similar to the California High School Exit Exam and meets the following 8 th grade standards: R. 2.2, 2.3; WS 1.1, 1.3, 1.5; WC SDSC Mid-level Expository Unit 8/13/07

2 8 th Grade On-Demand Expository Writing Samples Looking at what students are doing, and not doing, to inform instruction Name/ Score #1 Just to Be Free Strengths Writes in an organized and logical way Varies sentence structure with proper conventions Shows understanding of both articles Areas to Focus on / Teaching Implications Challenge this student to bring herself/himself into the writing Help student to work on showing along with the telling elaborating on why it matters drawing some conclusions and cultivating voice along with the facts #2 Throughout History #3 A New Home Has a strong, heartfelt opening that synthesizes the articles and perhaps some personal feeling/voice. The complicated issue comes out right away. Takes risks with some complex sentence structures Demonstrates voice Weaves thesis and ideas throughout the piece Crafts word choice deliberately Sees himself as a writer Uses conventions creatively Elaborates in a purposeful way Enhances intended effect through repetition and sentence structure (clauses at the front end of statements). Work with student on providing more evidence to support the student s big idea. Work with student on verb/tense agreement Encourage student to revise conclusion for clarity Look into publishing opportunities for this student Help student hone his sarcastic edge in other forms of writing Discuss voice and awareness of audience and purpose when using sarcasm and the importance of backing up prior knowledge /opinions with documented facts. Perhaps suggest the student avoid using numbers or exact percentages if he/she can t back it up with evidence #4 Mexico Life at The Border Understands what the reading is about and knows how to lift and manipulate the words Organizes the given information into paragraphs Use student s ability to manipulate the language to focus the student s revision into a paper that uses his/her own words #5 Immigration Concerns The U.S. Effectively blends/synthesizes the two articles with some interpretation. Uses quotes effectively Has a fluid style of writing (e.g. As it is stated, some issues are) Speaks to the prompt Work with student to develop a more well-defined and coherent thesis less broad Work on voice With a more clearly defined thesis, perhaps more of student s own voice would come Encourage student to take risks to become more personally engaged with the topic- what is it he/she really wants to say about this?

3 Writing Sample #1 Just to be Free One of the largest growing problems in the United States is that of illegal immigration. Each year, between three and four hundred thousand people attempt to cross the border between the United States and Mexico illegally. It is not a simple task, however, to cross this border as there are eleven thousand US Border Patrol agents to prevent these illegal entries from taking place. This problem of illegal immigration has led to violence, drug problems, and even numerous counts of murder. A major problem that is proposed at the border involving immigrants planning to illegally cross the United States/Mexico border is violence. At the time that the provided article was written, there were as many as five hundred people murdered along the border. Many of these were a result of deadly clashes between criminal gangs. Not only are people being murdered in gang clashes, but are also being killed by children who are being recruited/paid to smuggle drugs into the US and shoot people. This is not, unfortunately, the only way that people are being killed when trying to cross the border illegally. Each year, approximately four hundred people die because they get lost in the desert or drown in rivers while attempting to cross into the United States. These people are risking their lives to have a chance in another country that is abundant with opportunities, which is a very heavy choice for people to need to make. The United States government and lawmakers are working on laws to prevent this growing problem from continuing. For example, some Americans have formed groups called Minutemen who volunteer and help out themselves. President George W. Bush,

4 Writing Sample #1 however, is opposed to these groups and has proposed a program called the guest-worker program to help control the illegal immigration problem. This program would grant temporary work permits to many of the illegal Mexicans living in the United States. The United States lawmakers, however, believe that is not an acceptable solution because it would reward illegal immigrants for breaking the laws of America. At the current time, there is no true solution for the problem of illegal immigration but it is hoped that one will be found soon. Despite the countless efforts to put an end to the problem of illegal immigration, no solution has been found. This could be because of the many different opinions on the subject or simply because this is a very difficult problem to solve. Whatever the reason, it needs to be resolved because more and more people are losing their lives and are coming into the United States of America illegally

5 Writing Sample #2 Immagration: Concerns in the U.S. The topic of immigration is very contreversial one. There are many concerns in the U.S.A about illegal imagration. The illegal immagrints are people from other countries, mainly Mexico, that travel and live in America illegaly. They jump the border and they use any means necissary to get in America. They can work minimum wage or less, and generally get jobs other people do not want. But that is not necisarrilly true. In the article Today s Immagrints, it is stated that wages for jobs are low because there is a supply of cheap labor. If you stop this flow, wages for those jobs will rise, and legal residents will seek those jobs. In that same article, it is also stated that undocumented immagrins do not pay taxes. Or at least, they do not pay state or federal taxes. These issues have got America concerned with what to do. Some other issues are, as it is stated in Mexico: Life at the Border, terrorism. The bad security at the border makes it easy for an illegal immagrint to smuggle a dangerous thing in America. So what are some solutions to all of these problems? Well, Bush suggested a guest workers program, This would give the immagrints permits to temporarly work in America. However, most oppose to this solution, and it will not be put into effect. And as for the number of immagrints jumping the border, there are Minute men. These volunteers protect the border as best they can from any illegal crossing.

6 Writing Sample #2 So, all in all, there are many concerns in the U.S.A. about immigrants. But, it is not only a U.S problem. Illegal immagrasion poses problems worldwide. So what are we going to do about it? We need a solution, before its too late.

7 Writing Sample #3 A New Home The problem on illegal immigration, while existant, is blown vastly out of proportion. Hundreds and hundreds of thousands of Hispanic Central Americans attempt to migrate into the U.S. and 40,000 of them are minors under 18. People like these will rest at church shelters, to gather strength before immigrating illegally. The majority of these people escape Mexico or elsewhere in Central America so they can rid themselves of poverty or unemployment. There are indeed some problems formed by immigrants. The government claims that the Hispanics will bring terrorism to the country. While lawmakers think this is the biggest concern, it s really only a minor threat. A larger problem, though not exactly horrific to the government, is the rash efforts Border Patrol goes in order to keep Central American citizens out. According to the Mexican government 500 people were murdered on the border. Despite that most of these are deaths by gangbangers, Border Patrol doesn t seem like they could care less. Smugglers also, are present but it seems unlikely the majority of people bring horrible things into the country. Last, but not least, there is the issue of employment for these people, and what they will do when they get in the country. The problems mentioned in the last paragraph are all there and none of them are complete lies. However, the government of USA seems to have worked themselves up into a frenzy over much less of a problem than what they make it out to be. All of their pandemonium over so-called terrorism is 95 percent stupid. The vast majority of anyone in the entire world has little to no intent of hurting anybody, and any person who

8 Writing Sample #3 disagrees doesn t know what they re talking about. Smuggling is another problem which hardly ever happens, and everybody goes crazy over almost nothing. Note that while it does happen, and does exist, there isn t much chance more than at most one percent of immigrants pose the slightest threat. There are several efforts to stop what problems there may be, and some of them are good ideas, and some well aren t. One of the less fantastic plans is that of putting another 4,000 officers on Border Patrol. All this is going to do is increase the violence on the border and if someone with a so-called nuclear bomb in their shirt can get past 11,000 officers, another 4,000 is a waste of resources. Another dimwitted idea is that of using Minutemen, volunteers also wanting to place their eyes on the border. Somehow, they seem to think that they are more important because they were here first. Using this kindergarten playground logic, the Minutemen have come to a consensus that immigrants are stealing jobs from U.S. citizens. The only idea out there that has potential is, surprisingly, the President s. In what is his first half-good idea in five years, he wants to grant temporary work permits to illegal immigrants. While George Bush s idea is a step up from the others, it still isn t good enough. Because the horror and mass hysteria of immigration never happens, some solutions are there which the government doesn t notice because they are blinded by prejudice. One absolutely novel idea (not really) is treating the immigrants like actual human beings. There is certainly no means to completely stop any security, taking the ferociousness down a couple notches wouldn t hurt. Really, not much is stopping the government from simply doing a check on immigrants, and then letting them be on their merry way.

9 Writing Sample #4 Throughout history, people have come in face with lots of challenges in the United States in the events of shaping our nation. What our forefather wanted was the thought that this nation would rise and live on as a place to remind all citizens of freedom, liberty, and rights that the people have. However, many problems still occur over the course of history about laws and structures and the meaning of independence that yet continue to occur today. Now in America, governments was to face with difficult problems concerning illegal immigrants crossing the border. Although governments and patrol leaders defied and stop these immigrants, the determination of immigrants still give them reasons as to why to cross the border. Today problem that Americans face was illegal immigration of about 300, ,000 people try to cross border illegally every year. What official notice was that ten percent are kids under 18 years old trying to cross the border. Their reasons as to why they chose to escape was to have a better lives and to escape poverty in their homeland. Teens and adults willing to risked their life to cross the border knowing of the violence there. Some are recruited to smuggle drugs and while other are paid to shoot people, violence continue to occur at the border as 400 people die trying to cross border every years.

10 Writing Sample #5 Throughout South America Migrants travel up to the U.S. Mexican Border and try to cross, hoping to get a job or even a better life here in the U.S. The U.S Mexico border stretches about 2000 miles between San Diego, California, and Brownsville, Texas. Although thousands of Mexicans cross the border everyday many others cross in illegally everyday at a great risk. About 300,000 to 400,000 people cross the border illegally each year, and about 10% of these people are minors, which are people under the age of 18. There is also a shelter, a large mexican city named Reynosa, just south of McAllen, Texas. About 200 migrants each year stop at this church shelter to rest before trying to cross the border. Overall, many Mexicans just want a better life in the U.S. There are many dangers at risk trying to cross the U.S. Mexican border. There are about 11,000 U.S. border agents on duty to stop immagrants everyday. The U.s. is even thinking of adding 4,000 more agents over the next 5 years to help stop immagrants from crossing over. According to the Mexican government, about 500 people die each year at the border; most of these deaths are the result of big clashes between violent gangs. Also, each year there are 400 more deaths because the people trying to cross over to the U.S. get lost in deserts or drown in rivers. Many mexicans put white crosses along the border of Tijuana to honor those who died trying to cross the border every year. They blame this on the lack of security at the border. U.S. lawmakers are also worried about how the lack of security leaves the U.S. wide open to terrorists threats. Some americans have even made teams called Minutemen who help the border patrol too. But our president, George W. Bush, opposes these Minutemen and call them vigilantes.

11 Writing Sample #5 Bush has proposed an idea of how to help the illegal immagrints in the U.S. He proposes a guest worker program that would give temporary work permits to many illegal Mexican laborers. Apparently about half of the 10 million Mexicans in the U.S. are considered illegal. Many U.S. lawmakers are against the program who just see it as rewarding criminal behavior. Although many lawmakers are against the program, american hotels and restaurants still hire illegal immagrants because they will work for less money than U.S. standards. Many Mexicans cross the border everyday in hope of a better job or life, and this program will help them. Apparently, having a good education in Mexico won t get as good a job as one in Texas.